Tell them what's interesting

Something to try...

Next time someone's speaking, ask yourself: What’s one thing that really stands out from what they’re saying?

Then, tell them.

For example: 

“What really stands out from what you’ve been saying is the extent to which you’ve been challenging others to think differently about this problem.”

Or, “I love the fierce determination you’re bringing to this conversation. What’s driving that for you?” 

... and 3 reasons why

1. It gets you listening through a learning lens. Listening should never be an act of simply waiting for your turn to speak (although it can sometimes seem that way!). Instead, think of listening as a runway into learning. Seeing things in a new light. Understanding someone’s perspective differently. By adopting a deliberate practice of noting at least one highlight from what you’ve heard, it ‘forces’ you to listen through a learning lens.
   
   
2. It’s contagious. If you find yourself faced with others who don’t listen to you the way you’d like, the best thing you can do is listen and learn from them - overtly, as suggested above - in the hope it will catch on. This is especially true if your listening makes them feel good: as social creatures, we're predisposed to returning favours - and so it shouldn’t take long for them to feel they need to reciprocate the listening too. 
   
   
3. It fosters joint problem-solving. Each time you show empathy, you’re building a bridge between you and the other person. As you do so, you open up the opportunity for them to better understand your perspective too - ultimately leading you to a place where you can look at a problem together and share the challenge of solving it. 

Hope that's helpful. Let me know how you go... or what stands out for you from this post ;)

Cheers

Simon