Leadership is an effect

I get to spend my time with lots of different leaders and leadership teams.

And so I often get asked: “How do we compare with the other teams you work with?” 

I’ve always found that such a hard question to answer. Because it raises another question - what are we comparing? I'll usually follow up with: “In what way?”

People typically respond with things like…

• “The way we engage in these kinds of conversations.”  
• “The level of thinking in the room.”
• “Our ability to challenge each other.”
• “Our curiosity.”

Recently, one leader gave what is now my favourite response. After a moment of reflection, she said: 

“I guess in terms of the overall effect we have on others… like, how do you feel after spending two days with us?”

What I loved about her response was her recognition that, for all the things leaders do or don’t do - the underlying capabilities, styles and processes - what ultimately matters is the effect they have on the people around them. 

Me being me, I asked her one more question.

“How are you hoping I might feel after two days with you?” 

She smiled. “I’d hope inspired. Optimistic, confident in our alignment and clarity. Willing to come back, even?” 

Now I could respond. She and her team had given me all those things, but there was something she’d missed. 

“The overall effect of this team,” I said, “is a feeling that this is a team I would want to be part of. To learn from. To emulate.“ 

So next time you’re reflecting on your leadership, ask yourself one simple question: what’s the effect I want to have on those around me? And then go ask those people how you’re going.

Because in the end, your leadership is defined by the way you make others feel.

Until next time,
Simon